Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Careless Words

When I was younger, before I became a Christian, I could be pretty vicious with my words, sometimes driving my classmates to tears.

One of the things which told me really that God had changed me was when I got really mad with somebody and wanted to retort... only to find that I couldn't! I had lost that ability to be cruel and unkind with my words.

But I soon found that to be a disadvantage! Even when someone would hurl a put-down at me, and I knew I could give one just as vicious back, I couldn't because something in me thought, "How will that person feel if I say this? I'm so hurt because this person just said ***, and I don't want this person to be as hurt as I am."

Crazy, isn't it?

Sometimes even in the Kingdom of God, the more 'meek and mild' you are, the more people choose to tear you down with words. To mock and make fun of you. Nobody is fool enough to make fun of those whom they know can turn around and tear them to pieces verbally, but yeah, pick on the one who will never turn around and hurt you.

That made for a lot of times in tears in the bedroom where nobody sees. And angry cries of, "God, why can't I be just as mean? Why can't I give to them as good as they give me? Why must I try to be like Jesus, if they aren't? After all, they are Christians too!"

God doesn't ever tell me anything about the other person. All He'll remind me is, Jesus never once retorted out of hurt and anger. Never once, even though the most vicious accusations and lies were thrown at Him. Even though He was mocked on the cross whilst dying for these ungrateful people!

And God reminded me too, that someday I will have to give account for every careless word spoken. I! I will have to give account! Not the other person or this person or that person... but I! So no matter what, I had to guard my own tongue.

In the Book of James it said that anyone who thinks he has religion but doesn't control his own tongue is deceiving himself, and his religion is useless. I had to jolly well try to take control of myself and not retort in anger.

It's not an easy road. I wish I could take the easier road, but that's not the way my Savior took when He said, "Come, follow Me."

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