Last night I was thinking about my kids and remembering an incident...
Orphanage kids joined us at our church's youth camp in 2004, 2005 and 2006. The luckier ones came for two years and had a blast each year :>.
By 2007 though, YA had grown so big there wasn't room for the orphanage kids to come to camp. I had to ask for permission to just bring ONE kid whom I felt needed special attention.
Walking down the road towards Chow Kit on the way to volunteer with the street kids, I bumped into two of the orphanage youths who had come for camp in both 2005 and 2006.
One of them (let's call him X) eagerly asked me, "Sister, this year we got go youth camp or not?"
I had to sadly tell him, "Sorry X... Youth camp is full this year. You all can't come."
And he quickly asked, "What if I pay for myself; can I go or not?"
Oh, how my heart broke to hear those words!
For an orphanage kid to raise enough to go to camp (at least RM200) is no little thing .... he will either have to work part-time in the school holidays, or dig into his savings for $$ that people have donated to him over the years (and don't forget that for an orphanage kid, this is all the money they have in the world. When they come out to work at 17 years old after SPM, nobody is going to manage their food, clothes, housing etc. for them.)
I never knew that youth camp and the friends that he had made there meant so much to this lil guy.
I had to tell him gently, "That's not the point. It's not about the money; it's just that youth camp is really, really full this year."
His face was so sad and disappointed.
As I walked away, I ranted in my heart, saying, "God, this is not fair. There are youths in church who don't even want to go to camp. Their parents have to persuade them to go. But there is no place for my kids who really, really want to go."
I just had to trust that God had something more planned for X. He wouldn't forget him and the desires of his heart.
You know, people always say, "Well, life is not fair." But people don't know just HOW unfair it can get for these kids. This lil guy X - his dad left his mom when he was little, and a few years later, when he was still a young boy, he watched his mother kill herself in front of him. When the orphanage finally found his dad, his dad didn't even want to see him.
I know my church has done their very best and I'm really grateful they let my kids in (hey, my kids ain't angels *grin*). I guess I just wish this world was a little fairer to my kids. I wish there was just a little more room and a little more love for the broken-hearted kids of this world.